Feedback from last week (Important points to note):
1. Need a stronger, clearer claim: are you comparing the intentions behind the building of the tomb figures by the two rulers? If so, how are you planning to do this?
2. To improve on introduction by adding in contextual information and other main points to the supporting of the evidences, especially textual evidences.
3. To work the ideas to support the essay into the thesis and make it stronger. Look more into the terracotta warriors segment. AND not to abbreviate the Japanese.
TASK Peer review (Week 10): Introduction and two paragraphs with a point for peer review at tutorials.
Proposal #2 – Tentative Title: The
The probable, similar intentions behind the creation of the clay Terracotta figures found in the First Emperor’s tomb and the Haniwa figures found in a Japanese Emperor’s tomb. (Namely Emperor Nintoku and Ojin during the Kofun period)
The intentions behind the building and creation of the Terracotta figures in the First Emperor’s tomb and the Haniwa Figures found in Japanese Emperor Nintoku’s tomb are similar towards their purpose of serving the Emperor in their afterlife. It is a point of contention as seen from the crossing similarities and minute differences in their characteristics and histories, namely: the History behind the Holy, Deity-like Statuses the Emperors enjoy, their size and appearances, as well as the material intricacies the figurines themselves were made in. I believe that the life-size Terracotta warriors found in the burial mount in Lintong, Shanxi Province in China were every bit as valuable and important to the smaller, plains for the Haniwa figurines based in the suggested burial location over at Osaka Plains at the Daisen Kofun for Emperor Nintoku. It is essential to bear in mind that both Emperors were thought to be descendants of the heavens; to which the influence vastly affects the whole purpose behind the creation of the Haniwa figurines and Terracotta warriors respectively.
1. Holy statuses of the Emperors
2. Size and Appearances
> 3 supporting arguments (Condensed.)
1. Quantity and Placement of figurines
Japanese: More decorative and ornamental like trophies, rewarding of the general worthy of serving by emperor’s side previously. At entrances, like guards? Huge quantity of 11k in numbers at Nintoku’s grave; three mounts too. Reflects status.
Chinese: Servants, similar to ancient Egypt. Numerous, refer to history that they are used to replace live human sacrifices due to the lack of manpower. Even to the point there is almost a battalion like sequence to them. Coloured and intricate; best for the emperor? Lifelike since they represent real funerary goods.
2. Size and appearance
Japanese: Slightly smaller than life-styles, but realistic in its depiction of the samurai armour.
Chinese: Life-sized with varying expressions; have proven to be coloured but paint faded over time and erosion.
Have you deleted your earlier proposal?
It seems as if your claim is that both the terracotta warriors and the haniwa were made to serve the emperors in their afterlives. But, how?
So is the quantity similar? But is the placement similar? Are they both lifelike? Can you list the similarities and differences and then create a clear claim and plan based on this? When am I seeing you for office hours?