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Future You

 

Retrieved from https://www.dexigner.com/news/32131

An interactive piece that I found interesting is “Future You” by Universal Everything. It is a digital interactive installation that “replicates” the human, into a sentient synthetic form. This form is mostly blob-like in nature, and whenever a different participant stands in front of the installation, the “reflection” changes, showing a new synthetic form, to represent this new participant.

While the installation is relatively simple in its interactivity, it converts one’s being to another form, giving one a sense of new, or uncanny identity. This can be perceived as a mask, or a projection of how one would be in the future.

The artwork is presented in Barbican’s AI: More Than Human exhibition, as the first thing that the public sees when they first enter. It acts as an introductory piece  to the exhibition that focuses on artificial intelligence and its predicted future, an interactive reflection of the future self. To me, the piece feels like a portal to a new future where one’s form is no longer “human”, but given a futuristic version of themselves to fit into this new world where AI might play a more important role than it does today.

Retrieved from https://universaleverything.com/projects/future-you

The screen acts as a mirror, the reflection  captured by a camera facing the participant. The camera detects various parts of the human body, and follows a rigging system attached to a variation of the reflection, then projected onto the screen. These reflections then mimic the visitor’s movements. These reflections start off as primitive, and then learn to adapt from the movements of visitors, creating a more “superior” version of themselves. Through this evolution, it generates a new visual response for each visitor, and apparently there are 47 000 variations.

Retrieved from https://universaleverything.com/projects/future-you

From what I have observed in the videos documenting audience feedback, many visitors were very interested in the project, as it was a very personal and unique experience to each and every one of them. A lot of them participated willingly through exaggerated body movement, children and adults alike.

Retrieved from https://universaleverything.com/projects/future-you

Retrieved from https://universaleverything.com/projects/future-you

The given context made a huge difference to how the project would be perceived. As someone who was aware that the context of it was an installation in an exhibition about artificial intelligence, I perceive it as a piece of work questioning this identity of artificial intelligence as it mimics life. However, should it be placed in a different context, it could mean something else entirely, or simply not have any meaning attached to it, and just be fun-driven. The ability to interact with it in a space curated about artificial intelligence gives it a sense of importance and message, I feel, that cannot be replicated in a different environment.

locale // marsiling research

I decided to go to Marsiling for my location.

In my initial plan, I had intended to go to Woodlands Town Garden, as it was recently closed down. After taking pictures for a few hours and heading to a friend’s house nearby, I realised that the neighbourhood was full of cats.

I decided to go on a second trip to fully understand their personalities. They were all very different and in my head I tried to personify them into company stereotypes.

Along with that I decided to give “stats” to each cat, for how they reacted to their surroundings.

There was a common rumour that all cats liked to be patted on the butt just before their tail. It was very wrong with the cats in Marsiling. Only a quarter of the cats allowed me to touch them, and only a quarter of those cats liked the butt-patting.

My initial idea on the get-go was to make a tabloid magazine on my assumptions of the cats. To basically create a super obnoxious looking zine that represented the whole ‘Company of Cats’.

My other ideas were to make use of the stats that I have found, and build a fantasy world. But after consultations, I decided to go with the tabloid zine.

I looked up on zine aesthetics that I wanted to try out, and referenced tabloid covers a lot.

Retrieved from pinterest

 

experimental interaction // Research Critique 3

 

https://youtu.be/16l7RQVbDsE

Members: Joey, Amanda, Celine


In what way has our project embraced problems, inconsistencies and accidents, I’d say that with acceptance, we, for one, didn’t keep with similar video orientations and dimensions. We accepted each person’s style of edit, making use of it to create a sense of instability and discomfort to our viewers. As Rosa Menkman says,

“Glitch studies attempts to balance nonsense and knowledge. It searches for the unfamiliar while at the same time it tries to de-familiarize the familiar. This studies can show what is acceptable behavior and what is outside of acceptance or the norm.”

— Rosa Menkman, “Glitch Studies Manifesto”

It’s through this attempt at making the familiar extremely out of the norm, the idea of making you turn your head back to look at it a second time, because you realise something was wrong. BUT! You didn’t realise what was wrong to begin with, untill you looked at it the second time. We gave you scenes of ADM, but with the right edits, it made ADM a little weird, a little wonky, and that was what created a new perspective in the video.


In our project, we decided to use video as our base format, and tried to create a sense of unbalance within the balance of normalcy. Walking around ADM, each of us took our own set of videos, based on what we felt was weird, shaking our devices or leaving them entirely still. We then edited them individually, to create a sense of glitch within the video cuts themselves. This involved either increasing or decreasing the speed, reversing them, or changing the visual aspect of it (changing the levels, adding music, etc).

There was a sense of mind deterioration, where normalcy was disrupted, as well as the idea of the destruction using video editing.


I would like to quote Chip Lord,

“It was more about the power of that image, what it would mean. And of course we have all experienced the actual moments, or days following the assassination, as sophomores in college in 1963.”

— Chip Lord, “Interview with Chip Lord” by Randall Packer

By creating The Eternal Frame, Ant Farm recreated a very powerful moment in American history. For one, the actual murder must have been a very sensitive topic to many, as he mentioned that there were many individuals who were against the type of works they were doing. It explores the distorting nature of media representation in which reality and fiction blend, using a ‘mockumentary’ style of filming. To recreate a scene that had been the childhood of many Americans, it gave a sense of power in something bizarre —  having a coloured HD version of the same moment from a decade ago (as well as a man in drag). It brought questions to the audience, and allowed them to rethink their ideas of the moment that the murder had happened. 

It was looking at a photo or a film and realising its many mistakes, for what ‘could have been solved’, or what ‘could have been retold’. It was giving a new layer of perspectives and opinions that one would not have looked at again if it was merely ‘perfect’.

And with this, I go by this quote by Jon Cates,

“Those systems might be broken, they might be glitched, and they might be imperfect and noisy, and that might be what attracts us or me to those systems.”

— Jon Cates, “Glitch Expectations” by Randall Packer

I am a fan of Korean idols, and recently found a music video which I found really interesting. At first glance, it was a typical song about apology, showing a pretty face with a pretty video.

But on closer inspection, I realise that the idol moved weirdly, and there were times when the video quality was that of a old handheld video-cam. It gave the whole music video a very eery feel, and suddenly it felt very personal, when it dawned upon me that it was a robot being styled to look like the idol. It was so uncanny that it creeped me out, along with the shaky videos and glitches, it was like looking at a scientist’s experiment video. Throughout the music video, the robot apologises, her lips move (although out of sync) and her head jerks (although extremely unnaturally) to imitate that of a living being. It was a very powerful message about being forced to be how everyone wanted her to be, and with this uncanny effect, gave strong feelings to the viewer, that they ‘forced’ her to be like a robot who was ordered around and emotionless.

I feel like this links back to the quote mentioned earlier. Without the glitchy videos and the dysfunctional robot, the video would not have had the same effect, and that makes it attractive in its own way.

If you ever want to watch it here’s the video:

MIANHAE (Sorry) by Heize

 

 

experimental interaction // Research Critique 1

It’s Storytime!

Let’s create a story together!! 🙂

We worked on our Micro-Project #2 on 22/01 and managed to execute it on 29/01. Joey, Naomi, Nok Wan and myself created a game that involved everyone in the classroom to create a story together.

The Rules.

Every audience member was allowed to write a maximum of two sentence with a time limit of thirty seconds, in sequential order. One by one, they add on to a story being formed together by their peers before them, and at the very end we get to read what they have written. Instead of allowing the audience to have Ultimate Freedom what could be written, our team decided to give the audience some variables to accomplish. For example, we gave the first audience member to start the story a genre, and gave someone in the middle of the “queue” something to add.

Also, by the end of the story, the audience have to somehow work together and make sure a character disappeared, along with a plot twist.

The variables to aid the audience.

Compared to the traditional way of writing a story where a writer creates their own world from beginning to end, nothing was planned ahead – even us as the ‘artists’, did not know what would have been the end result. We were as clueless about how it would go and had no pre-assumptions to how it would have ended. As co-creators of a story, everyone had to work together to make sure that each sentence they made linked to the next, along with the assumption of what the previous co-creator was thinking.

Depending on how one would think, a story can take a drastic turn, and eventually affects how the other co-creators will write the story. It was like creating an infinite pathway, but with each different co-creator, a route was then formed, resulting in the finished story.

The Story.

As Marc Garrett has mentioned in the D.I.W.O article,

“The practice of DIWO allows space for an openness where a rich mixing of components from different sources crossover and build a hybrid experience.”

As mentioned earlier, each co-creator’s contribution could possibly be a dramatic twist. Even though one of our requirements was to create a plot twist, it was evident that what happened down the lane of creation, that what the first co-creator had assumed was not anything like the final outcome. It works the same way vice-versa where a waiting co-creator ends up looking at a piece of work-in-progress that was nothing like they expected. They have to read through everything and decide on a sentence that could create a question in the next person’s head. It was like a constant process of questions and answers not by one person’s hand, but by many: a discussion going on within that one moment of working together without actually conversing.

Our crowd-sourced artwork was certainly different in the sense that it was a literary piece of art. We also gave variables to create a higher level of ‘difficulty’, as a game, but also to guide the ‘players’, also known as co-creators, so they have a rough idea of what to create within 30 seconds.

Lei working hard 🙂

It was very similar to how the Human Clock made use of co-creator’s ability to create their own pieces to contribute to a bigger project. In our artwork, the audience has their own power to change the story in any way they like, just like how the Human Clock gave their audience the authority to manipulate the picture in any way they wanted, as long as it had the numbers necessary to form the artwork (the necessary ‘variables’ for this piece.)

Like-wise, it was similar to Yoko Ono’s Cut Piece, where co-creator by co-creator, their options would be affected by the one in front of them. In Cut Piece, when someone were to cut a piece of sleeve off and there was no more sleeve to cut, the following person would not be able to cut any more sleeve, and decide to cut another piece of clothing instead. In our artwork, if someone were to mention that a character had already disappeared, then the next few people would not be able to mention a disappearance, and rethink their sentences again.

I hope everyone had fun!

foundation 2D project 2 // research

With Assignment 1 done, we have been immediately briefed for our next assignment: Forrest Gump!

So the first thing we had to do: find movie quotes.  And I had just the most perfect ideas in my head. I have recently been in love with musicals; and there have been a few really good ones that came from movies, or were made into movies. So I decided to find quotes from Heathers (1988) and Hairspray (2007).

One thing I like about these two movies are how they tackle various societal norms in the 1960s and 1980s. In Heathers, they made use of black comedy to talk about how suicide got overly popular in creating some sort of emotional sensation. Despite the movie representing something from the 1980s, I still felt like it was something relevant in today’s society, as if nothing has changed in the past 50 years.

Here are some of the quotes I have picked. In order to better understand the quote and how i interpret it, I will break the keywords down to aid my search for pictures.

And pardon the language used in some of my quotes. I like how direct it can get sometimes.

HEATHERS

 

 

https://media.giphy.com/media/ZZ8JgdJZadObS/giphy.gif Retrieved on 16 September 2017

J.D.: Chaos is what killed the dinosaurs, darling.
(Heathers, 1988)
This could be interpreted in many ways, and one would be to take it literally. But I’m going to try looking at it in a more figurative sense, and put what J.D. had said in context to understand the phrase better.
He mentions how he wanted to destroy society so that it can be built anew, into something where all different types of people could work together in harmony. He’s basically referencing this to how dinosaurs became extinct; which allowed for the Ice Age to have happened, followed by evolution to have eventually resulted in homosapiens existing.
Without the initial chaos, nothing would have changed. And he was willing to go as far as to cause an explosion in school for that to happen. He wanted society to ‘wake up’ from its chains of societal judgement. He states it matter-of-factly, as if it was only logical that killing everyone would result in change, just like how the dinosaurs died off.
Now looking into the various keywords!
Chaos
Chaos could mean the Big Bang. Chaos could also mean many people clashing into each other. Chaos in general, is a sense of disarray. But what J.D. wanted was an explosive sort of chaotic. He wanted things to end. So chaos could mean bombs.
Killed the Dinosaurs
So the dinosaurs are dead. I can try representing them with something not dinosaur-like, but I would prefer having dinosaurs in my print. So I picked some dinosaur fossils along with some dinosaur engravings to represent them.

https://68.media.tumblr.com/cb58af985002f797bb5ad58cbde310ad/tumblr_oqqd738j7z1uwkhb9o1_500.gif Retrieved on 16 September 2017

J.D.: The only place different social types can genuinely get along with each other is in heaven.

(Heathers, 1988)

 

A quote that resonates deeply in me; as someone who has difficulty blending well into places such as school. JD basically mentions that different people will never truly be friends with one another unless they were dead, and thus making any sort of interaction among various cliques impossible. As a loner in school, he lives with his own set of values, often stubborn and unwilling to change himself, and often blamed society for the problems that came his way. He had wanted to blow up the school in an attempt to prove a point to his concept of ‘society’, as if society had done him wrong by being the way it was.

In a way, I had thought that it did make sense; I didn’t agree with how most of society worked outwardly, where nobody truly understood one another. Someone would commit suicide, and everyone would make a pity post on facebook in some sort of attempt to prove that it wasn’t their fault, and that they ‘had been there when the victim had been alive’. He wanted to change that; he had wanted to get rid of a generation that thrived on being superficial beings.

So here are some of the keywords I picked out and explained further.

Different Social Types

I’d see this as different stereotypes in typical American high school fashion. There are the nerds, jocks, cheerleaders, band geeks, goths, etc. I’ll separate them into more iconic parts that represented these groups of students in school. I’ll also attempt giving an animal representation to each group. Of course, they are not accurate depictions of said groups; just how I’d like to see them in a 60’s context.

Nerds:

Commonly associated with glasses, books, sweater vests, brains and buttoned shirts with bowties. Otherwise, there were also gaming nerds, who were associated with laptops, game consoles and headphones, or generally introverted/lazy.  Possibly linked to dolphins, pigs, etc.

Jocks:

Commonly associated with varsity jackets, good bodies, sports, or could possibly be looked at as generally bigger dogs such as golden retrievers/German shepherds.

Cheerleaders/Popular girls:

Prim and proper. Commonly associated with makeup, slim figures, pompoms, and gossip in the girls toilet. Could be seen as either cats, or snakes.

Goths:

Commonly associated with skulls, drugs, cigarettes, metal accessories, etc. Could possibly be associated with animals such as vultures, reptiles, etc.

I will stick with these 4 main stereotypes for now!

 

Get Along

Getting along could mean a lot of things. But simply putting in this context, it would mean living together in harmony with everyone in a society.

It could be represented by hugs, handshakes, or hearts. Wow, so many Hs. Just like how there are three Heathers.

Typically, getting along can be represented by peace. Peace can be seen as doves, the peace symbol, Earth as a whole, nature, etc.

 

Heaven

Heaven is commonly represented with clouds, pearly gates, halos, angels, gods, and so on. To be honest, that’s just a very typical setting given with religious annotations and context given to it. Would there by any way to truly explain what Heaven is? Each religion had their own variation of this, so maybe I could try mixing this up a little?

Besides the idea of clouds and an eternity of good times, Heaven, in other religions, could be represented by a temporary place of sensual pleasures, before being reincarnated. It can also be explained as paradise, where there are gardens, and families reunite happily over lots of foods and drinks.

 

https://img.buzzfeed.com/buzzfeed-static/static/enhanced/webdr02/2013/1/17/13/anigif_enhanced-buzz-1784-1358445874-1.gif
Retrieved on 16 September 2017

Heather Chandler: Well, fuck me gently with a chainsaw. Do I look like Mother Teresa?

(Heathers, 1988)

 

An iconic phrase in the movie; that eventually got used in the musical as well. Heather Chandler looks in disbelief at Veronica Sawyer, as if she had just said gibberish. She then makes up an equally as crazy sentence, in a whole sense of sarcasm. And I live by sarcasm and irony; thus explaining why I want to use this quote. Bless Heather.

Heather, being the Most Popular Girl In School™, had her influences in all corners of the school. Her word was Final, and if she didn’t like what was going on, she could change it because everyone listened to her. She had her looks, and she had her charisma and she was only a junior in high school.

This gave her all the right to be a mega bitch, and she could do anything she wanted. She could curse all she wanted and she could grab any boy and have them smitten with her.

Mother Teresa

Aside from the obvious vulgarity and the even more painful description of being plunged deep with a chainsaw, she mentions sarcastically; the idea of her seeming in any way like Mother Teresa.

In a sense, Heather was like Mother Teresa. If anything, she had the charisma that was similar to that of Mother Teresa, how she’d be praised for things she has done, but also criticized by a minority for her various actions. But given her general lifestyle, it was probably better to say that she was an anti version of Mother Teresa.

Besides the usual holy things that could be associated to Mother Teresa, I could also make it seem a little more devil-like. Or just anything that went against how Mother Teresa would have been like, in all sense of Catholic Christianity. Of course, there should be limits to how I do this, because this is going to be on a tote bag. Can’t get too political here.

Chainsaw

Chainsaws have been linked to DC’s Harley Quinn and generally just manic pixie girls in skimpy cheerleading outfits for the longest period of time. It’s funny how it got referenced in such an old movie; as if it was also a thing in the past to have chainsaws on cute girls.

Along with all these obvious points, I also want to show how Heather Chandler was basically a snake in disguise, given her rude attitude towards Veronica whereas she remained disgustingly nice to most others. (Nothing against snakes, however. I love them.) Snakes were commonly represented as someone who was very cunning and two-faced, especially in many western cultures.

 HAIRSPRAY (2007)

https://68.media.tumblr.com/0c241c619240c9b89731042db984cc94/tumblr_nogjegrYd61r7pxxqo1_500.gif Retrieved on 16 September 2017

Penny Pingleton:  I am now a checkerboard chick!
(Hairspray, 2007)

 

 During a time when courting someone of a different colour was shunned upon, Penny Pingleton dared to announce that she was dating a black man on live television, and even  kissed him. Living in her house with an extremely overprotective mother, Penny was a sheltered girl who could never experience anything too ‘dangerous’ for her. In a you-only-live-once attempt, she yells excitedly that she was now an integrated girl who would date a non-white guy.
The phrase is literally talking about someone being black and white. And chick would basically be slang for a beautiful girl, like how people use the word lassie. 
I want to try something more literal with this one, and make a pun out of it. Because hens and chicks. Hands. And Cheeks. Haha. Ha.
But anyyy way. I look forward to playing around with the compositions! Hopefully I will come up with something that would look fabulous on a tote bag. 🙂

foundation 2D project 1 // research

Creating a dot, line, shape with absolutely anything, and putting it on something be it paper, cloth, or your body; that’s the idea of mark-making.

There are various ways to achieve mark-making, and there are many techniques that gain different results, be it gestural and loose forms, or structured and disciplined lines. Artists can use thick and black lines or create grey and somewhat ambiguous blotches to show different sorts of emotion; there’s no limit to how one can deliver their emotions through ink and tool.

I looked up several artists and their methods of mark-making, and everyone had such different techniques and personalities that made their pieces so unique. One such example is Franz Kline, an American artist who had started out as a realist.

https://uploads5.wikiart.org/images/franz-kline/mahoning-1956.jpg!Large.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

Franz Kline was known for his minimalistic black and white works, moving on from his realist style for a more abstract approach. His mark-making consisted of thick, bold strokes, often in an extremely dark and deep black ink. Many have said that his works were likened to Japanese calligraphy, with the lines differing in thickness but remained equally strong and controlled.

On the other hand, Cai Guo-Qiang made use of gunpowder explosives on top of paper to create his artworks.

Exploding House, Gunpowder on paper, 2006 http://db-artmag.com/cms/upload/57/onview/cai/20_guoqiang30_exp.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

A Chinese artist based in New York, Cai Guo-Qiang wanted to express the idea of primordial chaos using natural forms of energy. Despite its destructive nature, his works tend to give a softer feel compared to Franz Kline’s harsher strokes; due to its lighter shades of brown from the gunpowder, and the dust fading away from the center of impact.

I have also looked up on various mark-making tools that others have used, and how they have affected the various marks made on paper.

https://i.pinimg.com/564x/05/79/fb/0579fbb4a31dd90ed1bf4139098975ac.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

Stiffer materials (metal wires, sticks, etc.) tend to give solid tones of black, whereas organic materials (leaves, flowers, etc.) absorb the ink, and spreads said ink evenly across paper, creating a more diluted grey.

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/37/8f/f8/378ff8bffaef15ff2d0cbfb0ebdeff91.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/68/7f/ea/687fea4903337ddaa16781dde3007800.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

One good way to start is to play with texture and use all side of your mark-making tools. Feel free to get big splotches of ink onto paper, or small splatters created from the bristles of grass. Try to achieve unique shapes from the tools. Repetitive patterns can also be used, besides simple dots, lines and shape.

https://i.pinimg.com/564x/54/38/8a/54388a75324e7dddc644532d127492ae.jpg accessed on 21 August 2017

Some have even attempted using different mediums to experiment their tools on. Above, the artist has decided to use cloth as their base, creating a smudge-like effect that drips and stains. The use of white spots helps bring across negative space, which is something I wish to consider doing during my project.

 

Tools I Have Considered:

After much consideration, I have chosen a few things around the house to use as mark-making tools. Some with more organic forms, some more hard-edged, or some in between.

BUBBLE WRAP: A nostalgic piece from childhood. Everyone always has the urge to press on those bubbles, and it gives off a somewhat calming atmosphere when you are in your own world like that.

CDS/BROKEN CDS: CDs are rarely used nowadays; I asked my parents if they had any to spare, and they said I could take all the blank ones. They are cheap and we don’t have a CD burner. “Just take them lah!”

FACE GELS/BODY LOTIONS: Something to mix with ink to hopefully create a different consistency.

GLASS PEBBLES: They came from a part of my polytechnic days when each of our campmates would give it a well-wish and pass it on to you. They all have different shapes, although the texture is smooth.

METAL CHAIN: Given its interesting form, it is possible to create something unique out of its flexible shape and hard smooth surface.

FLUFFY FINGERLESS GLOVES: An essential for the easily-chilled. Curly fur bits can be used as a sponge, and further dabbed into a softer grey.

PAPER CLIPS: A simple daily object. Perhaps grabbing a bunch of them to use as a singular tool might create something interesting.

CLINGWRAP: Could be used in various ways; bunched up, rolled up, scrunched up like a tissue, etc.

WASHI-TAPE: I am considering using this to take ink away from certain parts.

TOILET/TISSUE PAPER: 2-ply, 3-ply, 4-ply. If I can find them.

BODY PARTS: Expression starts with the body. Why not use it.

There are many other sorts of mark-making tools out there that I might use in the future, but for now these are the few I will try experimenting on. 🙂

 

THEM EMOTIONS.

I had a few in mind, although I’m always open to the idea of being open-minded. See what we can get, right? But here are the few emotions I wanted to explore; and maybe I can get something out of it. Meanings are still somewhat vague; I know, I will work on it.

 

LOVE

Infatuation
an intense but short-lived passion or admiration for someone or something.

Basically speaking, it’s the short burst of lust that occupies the mind, which gets mistaken as a form of puppy love, ain’t it? Infatuation is a young emotion. A… somewhat pure, but yet mature emotion. It gives off the sense of youth, with its energetic behaviour.

Longing
a yearning desire.

Think of it this way: Long. It’s been a looooooong time. It’s like being stretched over a pot of boiling water, and your muscles are aching and you really want to snap. It hurts in a slow and seething sort of way, like your torso wants to give in from the tense feeling and you yearn it, yet can never get rid of the strings that hold you up above the pot.

 

 

JOY

Eagerness
enthusiasm to do or to have something; keenness.

You realise it’s dinner time soon after doing assignments for a whole day; maybe you want to reward yourself, and you suddenly get this burst of energy. Get it done and over with, and then food. Get it done and over with, and then food.

Relief
a feeling of reassurance and relaxation following release from anxiety or distress.

It’s basically holding a big ol’ dump for hours and finally letting it all go. I can’t explain this any better.

 

 

SURPRISE

Amazement
a feeling of great surprise or wonder.

Amazement could mean something respectful, or just all out awe. Like woah, this building is amazing. Or something like bewilderment that has the shock factor in it. But I’ll personally prefer amazement that goes like woah, COOL, I GUESS.

ANGER

Bitterness
anger and disappointment at being treated unfairly; resentment.

Like when your sibling gets something despite being younger. In other words, in teen lingo these days; salty.

Exasperation
a feeling of intense irritation or annoyance.

Ever get that feeling some point in your life when your parents don’t understand why you chose art for a living? Yeah, that. No matter how many words you try to use to explain why you wanted to survive on art, they will always remember to pick at you for it and you just sit there, kinda angry but somewhat speechless.

SADNESS

Anguish
be extremely distressed about something.

It’s like having a thing stuck in the back of your mind; like someone said: your hall has strangers coming in and out recently. Did you lock the door. Possibly, but you aren’t sure. Did your roommate lock the door. What if they didn’t. Oh god, they didn’t, didn’t they? Now your money is gone, your life is ruined, and that one piece of work you left on the floor could be in smithereens, your grades are now in the drain, and it’s because you weren’t sure if you locked the darn door.

 

Neglect
fail to care for properly.

I,

FEAR

Apprehension
anxiety or fear that something bad or unpleasant will happen.

Somewhat pacing, somewhat back of the mind thing again; but this time over the future. You could have done everything right but the possibility that you were born under the star of unlucky circumstances always haunts you. You pace every corner of the room because the ceiling fan could fall on you any time.